Remember the frenzy of the paparazzi when they caught Sarah Ferguson, the Duchess of York, having her toe sucked at a beach? What was the big deal? Was it that she was so well-known? Or was it that this piece of fore play was being conducted in a more or less public place? Or was it the toe itself that did it?

When it comes to love-making, we thought wed seen it all.

We know people do it in showers and baths, on board tables or under them, horizontally or slightly perpendicular, and vertically flat against a brick wall or against something anchored to the ground. But in all this, the toe just didnt figure.

Sure, we do seem to remember that guy who toasted a beauty of his time by drinking out of her slipper. But we didnt really believe that it happened. Or if it did, we could only assume that the gallant had already had a few drinks before he came up with the idea.

But as queasy as we get thinking about using a slipper as a glass, the imagination boggles at the thought of a toe as a snack. After all, when we look at our shoes in the dark recesses of our wardrobe we know where those toes have been, and are not entirely reassured that theyre worth any attention at all, let alone the intimacy of a suck or two.

Yes, we have heard that toes, like other body appendages, are sensitive and can be as arousing as the more recognized erogenous zones. But we also know our feet. So long as we remember that the soles are like sandpaper, the nails as hard as a rhinoceros horn, and about as sweet smelling as a three or four day old fish, love-making and toes will never be an equation in our books.

Well nibble the ears, kiss the fingers, make a few detours down the length of the body, stopping well beyond the danger zone of the toes.

It has been said that the man who first ate an oyster must have been the bravest man on earth. The same must be said of the man or woman who first decided to try out the toes.

So if you consider yourself a hot lover, and have never tried out your partners toes, youve still a long way to go.

Vlady Peters

Vlady Peters is an Australian Civil Marriage Celebrant performing weddings, naming, renenewal of vows and commitment ceremonies both for Australian citizens and for overseas couples visiting friends and relatives in Australia.

She is the author of two traditionally published books, "The Complete Book of Australian Weddings" and "The Small Organisation Handbbook" and is in the process of releasing two ebooks dealing with weddings and honeymoons.

Her major interest is research into customs and traditions of weddings.

By going back to the roots of customs, she believes couples can more clearly differentiate between what is essential in a wedding ceremony, and what is merely a personal preference.

This allows them to choose a ceremony reflecting their own situation within the framework of legal requirements.

Vlady has a bachelor of Arts in English Literature and Government, and has studied the writing of novels and romances. She has written children picture books as well as novels.

She is a member of Queesland Civil Marriage Celebrants - the largest Civil Marriage Celebrants Association in Australia - as well as member of Celebrants' Training Association.

She is also a member of Australian Authors, as well as Romance Writers Association where for a number of years she was the Convenor of the prestigious Emma Darcy Award - Australia's leading Lady of Romance.