Imagine you just met someone new. The formalities of names, jobs and the like have been exchanged and you seem to be getting along famously. But before you know it, a few minutes pass and it looks like youre running out of clichs!

Now what?

There comes a time in every conversation with someone youve just met when you must cross the chasm between HOW are you? and WHO are you? A helpful technique for doing so is by asking creative, open ended questions. These questions function as front porches, inasmuch as their ability to build rapport, spark creativity and invite people to share their experiences and preferences. Whats more, they show an interest in peoples opinions and insights.

The following list is an excerpt from my most recent book, The Power of Approachability, which has just been released and is available for sale on www.hellomynameisscott.com.

1) Who are some of your mentors?
Mentoring is a hot topic right now. In fact, some people make a living setting up mentoring programs for businesses and organizations! Thats awesome. People need more mentors. I know Id be lost without mine. So, its a perfect topic to bring up with someone youve just met. And you can learn a great deal about your conversation partner when you ask this question.

My friend Michael, for example, has a life coach, business mentor and spiritual advisor! When I first learned these facts about him I gained a new insight into the type of person he was. As a result I felt more comfortable sharing those same insights about myself. Thats another beautiful thing about asking these types of questions: self-disclosure.

2) Whats the one book thats been most influential on your business?
I go out of my way to ask this question to someone almost every day. Its probably because I am an author and I love to read. But also, the books people read are partly responsible for creating who they are and how they do business.

I gave a speech a few days ago during which I asked the audience this question. The responses were excellent...and varied. People yelled titles ranging from The Bible to How to Win Friends and Influence People to The Yellow Pages (nice creative thinking on that last one!)

3) Whats the biggest mistake you made in your first year of business?
Admitting mistakes, embarrassing moments and errors youve made is a perfect way to invite someone into your heart. After all, a self-deprecating remark is one of the most effective forms of humor. And people love to know that the person theyre talking to is human, just like them. Talk about making an instant connection!

A few weeks ago I popped this question during the Q & A session of a National Speakers Association meeting. When I finished, the room ooooohed. It sounded like a studio audience of a sitcom! Then the panelist I addressed chuckled and offered his response, which was a story about a failed project he worked on a few years back. When he finished a few minutes later he said, Thanks that was a really great question!

4) What part of your job do you enjoy the most?
This question is one of my all time favorites. Its fun, positive and always puts a smile on someones face because people love to talk about what they love.

Take my dad, for example. Hes worked in the closeout business for about 30 years as the president of the St. Louis based CWC Inventories (Closeouts with Class). When I asked him this question he said, The Booth! I LOVE standing at our booth at those trade shows, talking to customers weve had for 20 years, showing them new deals. Thats the best part about my job.

If you only used one question from this article, this should be the one. Ask it today. And just watch how the dynamic of your conversation partners persona changes. Its beautiful.

5) What quotations or motivational phrases do you live by?
The challenging, impromptu nature of this question stumps a lot of people. However, no better reflection of ones values shines like the words they live by. One of the valuable activities I do during various speeches is to have people write one of their words to live by on the bottom of their nametags. Then they have to share it with as many people as possible in the next five minutes. The room fills with laughter, smiles and instant connections! People discover CPIs (Common Points of Interest) and get to know each other on a new level.

Next time you have a meeting or a group session, try this activity out. And just watch the connections spark.

6) Whats your preferred method of getting the news?
I enjoy asking this last question because its a generation mirror. Whether you obtain your news from Larry King, CNN, Paul Harvey, USA Today, Yahoo, Google, Newsgroups, List Serves, Talk Radio or your local news station, each medium offers insight about:

Scott Ginsberg

Scott Ginsberg is the only person in the world who wears a nametag 24-7-365 to encourage people to become friendlier and more approachable. He is the author of three books including "HELLO, my name is Scott," "The Power of Approachability" and "How To Be That Guy." As a speaker, Scott works with companies and professionals worldwide on how to be approachable, become unforgettable and make a name for yourself. Scott has also been recognized by CNN, USA, Cosmopolitan and The Wall Street Journal as "The Authority on Approachability" & "The World's Foremost Expert on Nametags." And, he has recently been inducted into the Hall of Fame of Ripley?s Believe it Or Not.